It’s Dr. Seuss’ Fault

And no, it wasn’t because he wouldn’t buy me the toy I wanted.

It started as we were standing in line waiting to check out. Bookworm that I am, I was checking out a display of Dr. Seuss books. This gives Scott the brilliant idea to suggest that we give my little brother a copy of “Oh, The Places You’ll Go!” for his high school graduation in just a couple of years. Cue waterworks.

Now, I’ll be honest, my emotional sanity hasn’t exactly been great lately what with the never-ending saga “Which dog gets sick this week?” (more on that tale to come soon), so it didn’t take much to push me over the edge.

The fact that his little comment reduced me to tears in a toy store amused Scott to no end (he can be a jerk like that). So much so that he continued making comments about the impending event as well as all of the other milestones that will quickly follow…and I continued to shed tears. I can only imagine what the cashier thought about us.

Here’s the thing, I’m aware that high school graduation is a big milestone and should be a joyous occasion. And, of course, I expect Little Man to walk across that stage (because not graduating is not an option.) But there have already been so many changes in his life lately. He got his driver’s license this summer. He actually has a job. He got a girlfriend (who he begged me not to embarrass him in front of…silly boy.)

He’s not a baby anymore. And that’s hard to come to terms with for me.

When I first moved away for college, he was still in elementary school. I can remember coming home on break and having this little boy crawl in my lap and tell me that I was the best sissy in the whole wide world (and yeah, it was usually a ploy to get something from me….and yeah, it usually worked.)  Now if he crawled in my lap, it would be like the final scene in Elf  where Will Ferrel sits on Papa Elf.

When I think of how close he is to going off to college himself, it hurts my heart. It feels like I blinked and my little baby brother was replaced by this teenager.

Don’t get me wrong, I am so incredibly proud of the teenager he has become. He’s in an advanced high school program that will allow him to graduate with an Associate’s Degree at the same time he receives his High School Diploma. He’s smart (sometimes a little too smart.) He almost always remembers how to be a gentleman and use his manners. I know the places he’s going are going to be amazing. But by living away from him for so long, I feel like I missed a lot of his journey already.

I finally feel like I’ve reached a point in my own life where I have the freedom to spend more time with my family and be there, not just for the big moments but the little moments in between too. And even when he runs off to college, I’ll still be there to interrogate him about his grades and complain about his grammar. (And Joseph, if you’re reading this, you still can’t live with me instead of in a dorm. I love you, but I can spend time with you without sacrificing my sanity.)